I'm not a superhero...

It now seems clear to me that this blog will home the many mommy bloopers I encounter over the years. Just when I start to casually and confidently cruise through parenthood.....SMACK, something happens that will knock my ass right off my pedestal.

Yesterday, my little darling was here there and everywhere. We were like the traveling circus for the day, stopping to visit different friends, bopping around the store. All that craziness and some newly introduced carrots resulted in a not-so-happy, feverish, crabby, little man.

Today, I proceeded on as always, made a pot of coffee, did some dishes in between baby cries....poured myself a cup of coffee and realized, of course, I had no milk. If you know me, you know I am a caffeine junkie. It's my drug of choice and I begin to shake, sweat and hallucinate without it. But I need the freakin milk.

I bitched out loud, blaming this on my husband (who was at work), because of course it was his fault that I had no milk. I looked over at the baby, gazed out the window at the mild snow storm and six inches piled on the car and knew there was no chance I was going out to buy some. So I called my neighbor for assistance and ran out the door to meet her grandaughter at the end of my driveway (all while Ben was semi-content in his swing).

I took no more than two steps outside and felt a suffocating sensation take over me....I locked myself out and Ben in. I was half naked, at least for New England standards, wearing a tank top, pajama bottoms and thankfully a pair of granny boots. I bypassed the little girl at the end of the driveway and banged on my neighbor's door like a psychopath. "Give me the phone, I need the phone, phone, phone, phone, phone...". Finally she handed it over and I called my husband at work. "Ben, emergency, panic, run, now," was what managed to come out of my mouth.

Without discussion, I left my neighbor's house, and began to trudge through the 5 feet of snow left over from earlier storms. I couldn't open the gate in the backyard because snow was piled so high. I hopped the fence and tried for the windows...locked. Slider door, locked. I was soaked and could have cared less. I stumbled up a snow bank in the front of the house (without it the window would have been too high) and peered in at my little boy. He looked okay, but I knew at any moment the house could catch fire, or carbon monoxide would find its way in, or maybe the roof would collapse. All this worry led me to lose my balance and fall off the small mountain I had climbed up. Goodbye ankle.

Mike got to house in record time, even with the crappy road conditions; it was the longest ten minutes of my life. When the door opened, I sent Mike upstairs and I sat in the basement and sobbed. It was awful, I just cried and cried.

Once I calmed down, I thought about what happened. This is just one blooper among many to come. I'm a mom, not a superhero. Each day I'm learning along with my son. I may feed him rice krispies, accidentally hit his head on a cabinet while dancing, or lock him in my home. But...I am one heck of a mom, and my little boy thinks I'm awesome. Not to mention, he won't remember any of this...thankfully.