Mild freak out...

Yesterday, after a long day of work, I strolled into the house and conducted my daily 'belly examination'. It may be shear paranoia or some bizarre infatuation with my quickly evolving body, but I feel a strong need to monitor changes. I lifted up my shirt...looked in the mirror... and screamed.

Now, I have always had a cute-little belly button; a very small innie that I have taken great pride in. Somehow, over the course of one day, that cute little belly button has morphed into a HOLE in the middle of my stomach! I could fit three quarters in there!

You're probably thinking to yourself...silly girl, didn't you know that messed up things are going to happen to your belly button? NO! I'm the first person in my immediate circle to carry child, I have one sibling close in age, and I had no interest in discussing pregnancy with my mother.

In an effort to enlighten myself, I purchased a bunch of books the first week I discovered we were having a baby; I even bought Mike a book. We sat there reading, filling our brain with images of babies and nurseries. Similar to the time when I tried to 'enlighten' myself with classic books, because I was simply unappreciative in high school, I became DESPERATELY bored by page 30. I kicked 'What to Expect' under the bed and moved on to Nicholas Sparks...I'd much rather read of romance in North Carolina than hemorrhoids.

What do you do when you're knocked up and in a freak out moment? You call Mom. Never have I called my mother for advice on anything; at least not in the past ten years. But who else do you call. Is there a pregnancy hotline for frantic, confused women who are too lazy to read the facts? I splurt out to my mother, "Oh my God, I'm mutant, there's a hole in my stomach...something about quarters, blah blah blah...blah blah." She breaks into hysterical laughter...nearly chokes on her own saliva, because clearly this moment of vulnerability is highly entertaining. This is the advice I receive - "Well, when the weather get warmer, just lie out in the sun, pour some water in it and it'll become a bird bath" hahahahahaha....choke, choke! Needless to say, I wasn't amused. She called and left three additional messages, all of which Mike listened to and found immense pleasure in.

Fortunately, my dear friend Andi, called me and provided me with some facts. It's going to pop out...yes, we're talking about my belly button. The idea makes me queezy.

For kicks, I may just say screw the prego books and just see what happens. At least it makes my blog more fascinating. Before I hung up on my mother, her final words were "wait till you discover the MASK of pregnancy!!"

To be continued....